Reflections: Personal Growth- One Step at a Time
When I finally was in a position to replace my wardrobe from my high school days with more "grown-up" clothes, I refused to shop at department stores and opted for the more fashionable boutiques. Of course, it didn't help that one of my best friends, at the time, was a professional model, seamstress and worked in the cutest little boutique in town - and they had layaway!! I spent hundreds of dollars in one day on a fantastic wardrobe, and a few hundred dollars more on fabric and patterns to round out said wardrobe. Thank goodness I knew how to sew! My friend sewed me a suit that was to die for!
The one thing the boutique was a bit limited on was their shoe inventory, but there was a shoe store right next door, and so began my real love affair with shoes. By the time I met and married My Man, I owned 150 pairs of shoes, almost all of them high heels and of the highest fashion. Yes, I wore them all!!!
Over the years, I gave away all those shoes and acquired new ones, just not as many. Today I may own about 40 pairs of shoes and boots. That is about to change. I am going through what I am calling a personal growth spurt - and it's going to start with my shoe collection. I have several pairs of shoes that I can no longer wear because as I have gotten older, my balance isn't what it used to be and I can no longer wear the high heels. This caused me great distress. As I contemplate my life and the many, many changes I have lived through, it makes sense to let go of the things that I no longer wear or use. I am moving on in different directions than I had planned and dreamed about for so long. There are so many changes in store for me as I unclutter my life and our home (yet again!). I couldn't decide where to start and it was becoming overwhelming. I felt tied down, so to speak.
Then I voiced my concerns to Mama K (everyone needs a Mama K in their life!) and we talked about uncluttering our lives and, of course, I brought up the subject of my shoes. Mama K has, I think, 3 or 4 pairs of shoes, at most and it boggled my mind that anyone could have so few shoes. As we chatted, it became clear to me, that in order for me to move on and make the changes I need to make, the hardest thing for me to give up, next to my family and my library, would be my shoes. That is where I need to make a start. I need to part ways with the heels and invest in a couple pairs of shoes that will carry me through all the activities I now participate in. I can feel a bit of relief seeping into my mind as I contemplate the release of ownership of so many shoes that I hardly ever wear anymore. Not only is there a kind of peace as I come to this conclusion, but there is also some excitement over the gaining of valuable closet space.
Everyone goes through personal growth on some level. It is a continual event that can cause great things to happen. It is so very personal a thing that sometimes we don't realize what is happening until that particular "spurt" is over and we are onto the next.
I choose to make my shoe experience a place to start on another growth spurt. It will be hard to part with some shoes that have a particular grasp on my heart and I can forsee a bit of an internal struggle coming up as I move them from closet to the give away bin. However, in my mind's eye, I can see that it will be worth every emotional tussel as I win this victory within myself. I am confident that I will succeed to the point that I am already considering tackling the boxes of purses and handbags that haven't seen the light of day since I packed them away for our move four years ago!!!
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